Encyclopedia > Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense
Wikipedia:Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense
Redirected from Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense
- We need a page where bad jokes and other deleted nonsense can rest in peace. So, here it is! [I'm half tempted to suggest keeping the jokes inline with the pages, as they must sorta give the encyclopedia some lively color. But I do know it'd just get carried away and turn into an encyclopedia of silliness, so look forward to frequent updates of this page. ;-) ] -- BryceHarrington
So much appropriate material has been culled from the articles that this page has overflowed. Please add new bad jokes and deleted nonsense to:
Also see:
Some of this stuff is actually funny to some people:
Finally, a few people have gone above and beyond the call of nonsense and put extra effort into their creations. Check out the BJAODN Special Features:
- Wikipedia:Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense/ASCII cows
- Wikipedia:Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense/Peterson-Heimstead
Warning - do not smoke recreational substances while working on the wikipedia, or you too may produce entries like this:
From 2109
2109-All animals are taken over or eaten by robots, they are consumed as light snacks. Robots learn to reproduce with thier gigantic huge and delicous metal dicks. They become horny 24/7.
from fen
Fens were a 3-legged race of migrant smelly dwarves who nobody really liked but were uncertain how to get rid of in a nice way.They had a habit of making cucumber & eggy pies which tended to give them really awful gas which they had no qualms about sharing with whomever might be nearby.Although this was all done in a jovial nature it did not endear them in the least to the general population of England.Gertrit Mortldue is credited with ridding the Isles of them by starting a small, but effective, army of followers who befriended these dwarves and put gunpowder in their pies whenever they were not looking. Then the next time a Fen passed gas to a cohort he (or she) was blown to Smithereens. Smithereens is a small Isle off the coast of................
From line: In theology, there is a theory that there was chaos when people were trying to get into the gates of heaven. To cut down time the Archangel Micheal said "Hey, why not form a line." Hence the line was invented, and no more chaos at the gates of heaven
From class warfare: It is better like an ostrich burying its head in the sand to not so view society.
From Egyptian languages: A dead language that eventually not even Egyptians could read. The end.
From funeral: Funerals don't have to be expensive. They can be extremely cheap, and also environmentally sound. The best way to go is in a cardboard coffin, with a tree planted on top.
I think this conceivably was not intended as a joke
Indeed not- I have attended such a funeral of a local 'green' activist, amkes alot of sense to me. Personally i'd like to see the comment restored, if perhaps more tactfully rephrased... quercus robur
<warning - in bad taste> What about the "Feb 2002, Georgia Solution"?</warning - in bad taste>
From J. Edgar Hoover:
- President Richard Nixon's comment's on hearing that Hoover had just passed away ("That old cocksucker? We thought he was immortal.") cannot be taken literally, due to Nixon's well-documented predilection for prevarication.
From Cincinnati:
America's most liveable city.
Located on the Ohio River across from Kentucky.
Not an (intentional) joke. Cincinnati was rated the #1 place to live in the 1993 "Places Rated Almanac"
From Idiosyncratic[?]:
My dad knew him.
From HareKrishna[?]:
(For more on little-known religions' positions on sex, see BokoNonism.)
From English language:
A quick guide for those living in the United States - Colour is spelt with a 'u', Aluminium has 5 syllables, and Encyclopaedia does indeed have an 'a' in it. In addition, sulphur is not spelt with a 'f', foetus has an 'o', and 'organisation' is indeed spelt with an 's', as are many other words you spell with a 'z' (which is incidentally a 'zed', not a 'zee'), and it's "spelt," not "spelled." And if you can't use apostrophes correctly, *learn*. It's not hard. Plurals don't need them, normal possessives do, contractions do, 'its' as a posessive doesn't. Thank you. --- well, actually, I'm not partial to either spelling of sulphur, but the scientific community spells it with an 'f', so I suppose we're stuck with it. and to quote dave barry badly, "the apostrophe is used to warn the reader that an 's' is coming up, as in 'Try our hot dog's.'"
says who? Can't languages evolve? I don't see you spelling like Shakespeare...
- And even though I agree with most of the above, "fetus" is a latinate root, not a greek one, so the "foetus" spelling is not etymologically justified.
Foetus is a genuine Latin word. So, however, is foedus--it means a contract or agreement--whence our word federal (once foederal). "Organisation," though, doesn't have etymological backing, at least according to the OED: all those -ize/-ise words come from the Greek -zein, which was always spelt with a zeta. The rest of England doesn't care, of course.
From AustriA:
Austrians are known as the best lovers worldwide. Ha ha ha! You mean that's not an objective fact?! :-) Ever been to Austria?? Then you'll know what I mean;-)
Of course this has to be deleted this not a neutral point of view. To be objective everybody these are the French. ;) Ericd 03:17 Sep 8, 2002 (UTC)
From Actors:
Q: How do you make a little box?
A: With little boards. ;-)
What do you mean by 'little box'?
From LoGic:
The ultimate goal of logic is to show nothing can be proved.
From Abraham Lincoln:
Lincoln was shot at Ford's Theater. John F. Kennedy was shot in a Ford Lincoln. Gerald Ford was shot at, but they missed.
- (Actually, this is suppoed to be true. There was actually a wide range of coincidences involving the deaths of Lincoln and Kennedy. Quite a few of these can be verified. - Arno)
- (Actually true, Lincoln shot in Ford theatre, Kennedy in a Ford Lincoln. Lincoln's secretary was called Kennedy, Kennedy's - Lincoln. Both wives dreamt assassination in advance.Both succeeded by a Johnson. [JTD]
- (There are a wide range of instances with regards to any two things, most of them are pure luck. With regards to Lincoln/Kennedy, visit Urban Legends: Lincoln/Kennedy (http://www.snopes.com/history/american/linckenn.htm) for more information.) - TimmyD 06:57 Apr 28, 2003 (UTC)
Bad Bread Joke
Jonny went in to the bakers & asked for a loaf of bread.
Baker; "White or brown"
Jonny; "It doesn't matter, I'm on my bike."
From Agnostida:
Trilobita that aren't entirely sure whether or not God exists. Just kidding.
From Cannabis:
"balls for president"
From MAC address:
Mac is also my wife's uncle, and a very nice old guy.
Big Mac addresses however, are something entirely different.
From New World Order:
Hitler is not dead. The Germans cloned him just before he "died". Hitler and the new world order are behind this. Also, There are some new additions to the New World Order. These new additions are Mousillini, Stalin, Feidel Castro, Atillia the Hun, Genghis Kahn, and Sadam Husein. --Note- Atillia and Genghis Khan are the decendants of the original people-- they hijacked the planes that hit the world trade center and the Pentagon.
From History of computing:
The Flintstones used devices to aid in computation millions of years ago, for instance the abacus.
From Muslim Language:
But there is a secret language taught by the Prophet (peace be upon him) to his closest disciples, which only in this century has become publicly known. See http://www.geocities.com/muslimdict (enemies of Allah delete truth of his Prophet from this page, but Allah shall have HIS VENGANCE! they shall be cursed by Allah and go to HELL when they die! they are pagans and infidels and enemies of Islam, who deny the secret language revealed by Muhammad the prophet of Allah)
From Diabelli:
Diabelli also spent several years as rhythm guitarist with Frank Zappa And The Mothers Of Invention. He is best remembered for his contributions to the magnum opus "Billy The Mountain".
Diabelli, a homosexual, also reportedly had a long-running affair with former Secretary Of Defense Caspar Weinberger.
From 831:
In 831, a man named josephintee falltoay had befouled a villager who then placed a curse on the man and then he was forever to walk the earth as skeleton until he could kill the great great great great great great grandson of the man who placed a curse on Josephintee.
- Kids, don't do drugs. :-)
From talk:Mammalia:
"(Linnaeus named the order mammals for their breasts because he wanted to encourage women to breast-feed their infants.)"
From JohnnyCash:
The following seems to be a prose poem about the famous American country singer, JohnnyCash:
"Johnny walked the line, rock island line, on an orange blossom special, fell into a burning ring a' fire, had a boy named sue, on a sunday morning sidewalk, got busted for picking flowers in alabama? georgia?, bennie and the jets.. ain'choo worried 'bout gettin' your nourishment down in florida? i don't care if i do, die, do, die, do.. '56 '57 '58 '59 '61 '62 automobile, folsom prism blues, now slingin rubensesque metallica, waits, revival waddever songs of sin and redemption"
From Bird:
Birds go "GAW GAW!" which stands for "God Always Wins! God Always Wins!", which shows that birds do praise God and indeed go to heaven, in accordance with His divine providence. And don't even try and tell me this is wrong, because my freshman year theology teacher said it was true, and you wouldn't call an 80 year old retired Marine Officer and now a Benedictine Monk a liar, would you? Huh? Would ya, punk?
From Algorithm:
The term should not be confused with "Algoreism" -- meaning an embarassingly funny remark attributed to Al Gore, such as, "I invented the Internet".
From a justification for an edit given by a Wikipedian.
"I'm a liberal. I don't want to know the truth, nor do I care about the truth. Everyone else that bothers coming in contact with me are buffoons. That's why I don't like talking to other people because of my higher intelligence. If you disagree with me you are a imbecile and I will stop at nothing to prove it, even if it means lying and distortion of the truth. "
From Eep[?]:
eep opp ork aah-aah
the monkey says i love you
From 2Pac:
2Pac was the greatest of all time, and continues to be. Fuck the government and all them niggaz who shot him down. Damn, they can't stand a nigga toppin the charts. Thug in Peace my nigga 'Pac.
From Dont ask, dont tell:
2Pac Shakur, who ardually fought agaisnt the policy and its ban on gays, was later on gunned down (September 1996) by government officials, in an attempt to silence his, thuggish, though vey talented voice. For more on 2Pac, aka Makaveli, aka the Greatest Don of all time, please go here 2Pac.
From Jon Voight:
Jon Voigt is semi-gay, resulting in his bisexual daughter.
From KGB, listed as heads of the KGB
Kapil Jain[?] March 13 1954 - December 8 1958
Sharon Stone December 25 1958 - November 13 1961
Demi Moore November 13 1961 - May 18 1967
From Hippopotomus:
Hippos are just too cool for school!
no, actually, there are a couple in my geometry class...they take up a bit of room, but the teacher (http://immaculateheart.org/trujillo/snowboard.htm) doesn't mind :)
From Henotheism:
Describe the new page here. There exists GOD. He is so great that in order for us to understand him, he shows himself in more than one way (TRINITY). However, EVOLUTION was not the creation of godthefather. The angels were. They were "perfect" in everyway. godthefather (mr-know-it-all) created angels (minigods, gods of the pantheon), each one to display his myriad of emotions. But, as the chinese proverb Goes, a house divided against itself cannot stand. These "emotions" were conflicting and "running rampant" in "heaven". Similar to Nordic mythology it had three main players: Odin(mr know it all), Thor (Jesus Christ), and Loki (not satan, no, the HOLY SPIRIT, who moves in mysterious ways, who is the ultimate master of disguise and INTRUIGE. Think, chinese proverb in relation to the Trinity). So anyway, loki pisses off thor, thor comes to save the world, but "Marvel Comics" leaves this part out: THOR DIES, in the most altruistic mode (think Jesus Christ and SELF SACRIFICE) or think outside of the box, think SOCRATES. So after "Thor" makes this ultimate fool out of his "warrior image", men scoff at him (much like the "pharisees") scoffed at Christ. So what happens is that "Evolution" is created. Man doesn't see the need to sacrifice himself. Only the self righteous (you know who I'm talking about, the born again baptist fundamentalists) try to recreate Christ's crucifixion in their daily lives, but they miss the big picture: THEY HAVE NO RIGHT SACRIFICING THEMSELVES IF JESUS WAS TRULY 'thor'. Maybe Jesus thought he was invincible, much like the action hero "thor", but he didn't count on the resourcefulness of "evil". That is, ahem, the ability for minds to change and turn against the one who has the "answers" out of any "emotion". Gentlemen, what I am trying to explain is that in this point of evolution, man is nothing but an extremely complex, extremely "narcissictic" ANIMAL. If man is to ever be perfect he has to return to his mr-know-it-all way of thinking. Man has to emulate small things at first, like computers, but eventually, maybe, man will live beyond physical limitations, beyond science, beyond THE HUMAN MIND. The human mind is the only AI that is ever gonna exist. The human mind is "The Matrix". The human mind has conjured up legends of the most perfect angel (LUCIFER) "the ultimate narcissist (tried to play god.......genetics maybe?)" and God the Father "threw him out of paridise". If that isn't the ultimate parody on today's reality, I don't know what is. In order for the human brain to reach its potential, it's state of "COMPUTER" instead of its state of BOMIS, is for people to start being honest, upfront, and carrying a big motherfucking stick to back it up. That's the only way the "Animal" listens in the end: INSTINCT. This word that you are creating means, follow your instincts to the "PROMISED LAND".
From Far-fetched belief[?]
(The theory was part of the Angel article. But since aliens and UFOs are generally dismissed as nonsense, so is this theory.)
Some atheists believe that angels were crews of an alien starship that visited earth a long time ago. These crews wore space suits with a glass bubble helmet which was mistaken as halo. Their space suits had wings that allowed them to fly like Buzz Lightyear in the cartoon Toy Story.
The captain of the starship went by the name Jahveh. A mutiny took place on board. A high ranking officer by the name of Lucifer and his followers were exciled to earth after the failed mutiny. The unexplainable alien technologies were viewed as miracles by the primitive human civilization at the time. The starship stayed with humanity for a long time until the captain's son was crucified by the people on earth. The aliens gave up on humanity and departed, they promised to return.
Those atheists believe the books of Bible can be consistently explained in terms of alien visitation. The sharp difference between the angry God who flooded and burned humanity in the Old Testament and the lack of similar punishments in the New Testament and in today's world was explained by the departure of the starship.
From Brown
Brown commonly refers to Scott Brown, the most high!!!!! he will rule the universe with an iron toilet seat! His wrath will fall from the sky like ......something that ....falls...from..the sky?
The entire Fieldism[?] page looks like a bad joke, so I've moved it here: "In the beginning Fieldism was revealed to AM. He had the idea of a religion with no beliefs and whose only rule was that believers of Fieldism must sit naked in a field. This resulted in the Fieldist question, "Haven't you ever just wanted to sit naked in a field in peace." Fieldism was then taken over by Elrond Ytterbium, owner of Rubber Chicken Enterprises. Elrond dreamed of turning Fieldism into a for-profit religion, and creation of T-shirts commenced. The original text outlining Elrond's intentions can be found here.
Because of the unique nature of Fieldism, opposition has existed since the very beginning. The Anti-Fieldists were the first to respond to the newly formed religion of Fieldism. The now-defunct group was formed the same week as Fieldism. Their only mission was to disagree with anything said by Fieldists. This became tiresome rather quickly, and the Anti-Fieldists soon went the way of the Swiss Anarchist Foundation. Thus, Fieldism emerged from its first conflict stronger than ever.
At this point, Fieldism began the process of splitting into factions. These factions catered to specific beliefs and allowed a religious framework to be formed inside the chaos of pure Fieldism. The Swampists were the first group to split from Fieldism proper.
MORE TO COME www.fieldism.org" Vicki Rosenzweig
- A friend of mine just pointed this out to me. He made a fake religion up and put it on here as a joke, b/c he thought the wikipedia would never work. I'm deleting it. MB 18:21 13 Jun 2003 (UTC)
From Grace Hopper
Bad Jokes Section
What is a Grace Hopper? A grasshopper in church.
Told you it was the bad joke section! :)
From Hot Grits[?]
I just poured HOT GRITS down my pants
From CARROTS[?]
WELCOME TO THE OFFICIAL CARROTS HOME PAGE ON THE WORLD WIDE WEB!!
CARROT[?]S ARE A VEGETABLE[?]. YOU CAN EAT THEM IN SALAD[?]S AND SOUPS. YOU CAN EAT THEM IN DESERT[?]S AND JAIL[?]. CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION ON CARROTS.
From How to tell the origin of an accent (Hebrew):
Sometimes they yell at each other or slam on table but they don't mean to be rude, it is just the way they speak.
From Erica Fishbein-Gold[?]
Erica s a wpner of a woman. She glides through the air with the greatest of ease, yes she glides through the air in a flying trapeze. She jumps and she shouts and she does sorts of things she can do anything because of what she brings to the park and the class of the grade of one two she has two feet and on each a shoe. Yay Erica.
From Clam Dip
Clam Dip: The god of soggy potato chips in modern mythology.
Clam Dip is the son of Hera (god) and Walky (mortal[?]); however, he seems to take mostly after his father.
His powers include, but are not limited to: Conjuring potato chips, superfast munching and silly jokes.
From Battle of Tsushima
russian meet japan for a naval fight. russia start to loose but then the russian avatar came down and ate all of the japs. the japs could do nothing but summon godzilla. godzilla and the russian avatar named the Czar fought for many years until king kong stopped them, and then the three of them went and fought motha!
From Henry David Thoreau
Thoreau went into the woods and made love to trees. No kidding. He actually had sexual intercourse with them. Far out, huh?
From the deleted article Millions of worthless entries
What is the Wikipedia
From most popular family names:
- Australia
- Dundee?
(editor's note: for the record, 99% of Australians are as likely to run into a crocodile as a resident of Portland, Oregon is to run into an alligator.)
From Cactolith[?]:
A cactolith is a quasihorizontal chonolith[?] composed of anastomosing[?] ductoliths[?] whose distal ends curl like a harpolith[?], thin like a sphenolith[?], or bulge discordantly like an akmolith[?] or ethmolith[?].
(note: A google search shows that this quote is actually in a 1953 geology book, Hunt, Charles B.; Paul Averitt and Ralph L. Miller
_Geology and Geography of the Henry Mountains Region, Utah_...)
- Karl Marx -- comically insane economist
- Marx Brothers -- insanely comic vaudeville act
From United States Army:
The United States Army is a great deal more famous due to the image below:
Lol, thanks for re-posting it where it belongs ;).
from Commerce, Georgia (since deleted)
Commerce is the home of many famous, and well-endowed red-headed women. These are available in the many outlet malls around this grumpy town off I-85 in north Georgia
From Ahmed Alnami:
Terrorism aside, he was actually quite a good looking guy.
From Microsoft:
Win·dows
Noun.
A thirty-two bit extension and graphical shell to a sixteen-bit patch to an eight-bit operating system originally coded for a four-bit microprocessor which was written by a two-bit company that can't stand one bit of competition. -LW
From insect:
Let's not overlook the (genus?) Nupedia, a kind of fly! ;-)
- There actually is such a fly, though it's not mentioned often, and I'm not sure whether it's a genus, subgenus, old name, or what. It's in the family Anthomyiidae. -phma
From Drexel Shaft (now deleted):
The Drexel Shaft is more than a building. It's a metaphor for everything Drexel University will screw you over on. Things like lost health insurance forms, six fire drills in a week, being forced out of your dormatory every time a break exceeds three days... those and more are what makes Drexel so special!
Legend has it that every time a student gets screwed over by the University, it grows another inch.
From Popper
Put your text for the new page here. POPPERS GIVES U A BANGING HEADACHE AND IT LOOSENS YOUR ARSEHOLE MAINLEY FOR GUY PEOPLE AND RECHEADS
From Bob Marley Miami, Florida, May 11 1981 - Remember when Bob Marley brought reggae to life in the 1960s and 1970s? Now he is dead, and as a result, so is reggae. Marley, 36, was giving a tour at Miami, Florida, when there was a sudden outbreak of testalgia. Testalgia is a fatal disease that causes the testicles to shrink and harden. Anyway, Bob Marley caught the disease while giving his concert, and a minute later, he felt his testicles shriveling up. He had to announce in public that he was dying of testalgia and therefore could not continue the show. The audience booed. He died a few minutes later, and everyone felt sad. It was the end of the reggae era. The next day, everyone in the city came to his funeral. As the "apostle of reggae", as Marley was known, was laid to rest at the cemetery, the people of Miami all watched in horror. Recently in to Miami from New York City, pop/rock superstar Billy Joel, who heard about Bob Marley's death, wrote two songs at once, both about the death. They were, of course, "Miami 2017 (a.k.a. "Seen The Lights Go Down On Broadway") and "Only The Good Die Young." These two songs were released together as a hit single and later on Joel's new album "Rest In Peace."
After Marley's death, "Rest In Peace" hit the top of the Best-Selling Albums Charts. By the end of May, 99.9 percent of all Americans owned at least one copy of the album. The money that everyone had spent on this super-popular album went to a fund that supported a charity to end the Miami Testalgia Outbreak. Protesters held up signs that said, "End Testalgia." Joel came and wrote the lyrics to a new song of the same title, while his good friend and touring partner Elton John wrote the music. Together, they performed the song live in front of the whole city. After their performance, President Reagan came to Miami to give extra support to the End Testalgia Fund (ETF). Later, on 106.7 Lite Fm, Elton John and Billy Joel sang "End Testalgia" once more, then hosted the Lite Fm Testalgia Special. After the Special was over, John and Joel prepared for their next tour at the Miami Garden Theatre. At their tour, they sang "End Testalgia" as well as their new hits from Joel's "Rest In Peace" and John's "Honky Cat." They sang some of their older hits as well. The tour was both a great success and a great way to raise money for the ETF. The ETF kept collecting money, and soon it had enough to end testalgia once and for all. The supporters of the fund came up with a way to create a vaccination that could permanently get rid of testalgia. The vaccination was then used on everyone in the United States. Now testalgia had been totally prevented. In honor of the ETF putting testalgia in the past, Elton John and Billy Joel returned to Miami with "The Sweet Smell Of Success."
From Battle of Otford[?]
THE BATTLE OF OTFORD IS STILL ONGOING, I HAVE A BATTLE TO PARK MY CAR EVERY TIME I GO THERE
From Wikipedia:Vandal bots[?]
Vandal bots are malicous programs which deliberatley vandalise wiki based websites, these bots can wreck websites at an amazing rate. To imfamous vandal bots include
Ram-Man Bot, This bot autogenerated 50,000+ articles about EVERY settlement in the united states, using us census data. The articles are nothing but complete nonsence, and it DDOSed Wikipedia for several weeks.
Sciplius, this bot automaticly deletes articles at random..
Vandal bots are very malicous, but blocking them is almost impossible, it is up to the community to keep the wikipedia free from vandal bots, there could be new attacks in the future.
From Danielle Brisbois[?]
She became addicted to beer and cheescake, in 1988 she was admitted to a New York hospital weighing in at 450 lbs. She now lives in Rhode Island with her husband and mother in law, together they design fashions for extra large women.
From Witness (1985 movie)
It was filmed in Intercourse, Pennsylvania, although no intercourse actually is shown in the film
From Cristóbal Colón
I always thought he was an ass. Now I know he's a colon.
From Oatmeal
Oatmeal contains small monsters that eat excess fat and help aid resfull sleep.
From Secret decoder ring[?]
BPM TMBBMZ M QA BPM UWAB NZMYCMVB
(Bpqa qa rcab i Kimaiz kqxpmz eqbp iv 8-tmbbmz apqnb.)
- Transliteration for your convenience -- John Owens :
- THE LETTER E IS THE MOST FREQUENT
- (This is just a Caesar cipher with a 8-letter shift.)
From Center for Strategic and International Studies[?]
the martians are invading earth! they demand plastic cup holders for unspeakable acts of alien reproduction rituals!
From "Unwritten article"
Unwritten article:
1. A piece of writing not yet completed 2. This!
From Amoeba
Most ameobae range from about 1 mm. But in Japan a 30 foot long amoeba was found after the atomic blast in Hiroshima. It is the largest recorded amoeba in history and has devoured two human beings. if you see this amoeba it is recommended to run for higher land. if you are in water dive under and swim to the safety of the land. Do not feed this amoeba because it will become even hungryer and chase you until it has devoured you too. This happened to the two humans. Many small dogs are missing so if you have a small pet keep it inside and away from water!
This deserves a Pullet Surprise. --Ashi
From Peristalsis
- Peristalsis is a condition which occurs when one listens to the music of Steve Perry. The falsetto vocals invoke a constriction of the sphincter muscles to a degree which inhibits defecation. This condition birthed the familiar phrase "I don't give a shit about Steve Perry" which is quite likely the case.
From Jehovah's Witnesses
They were fed to lions by Nero Caesar. They were thrown into the fiery furnace by Nebuchadnezzar. They are currently targetted by the secret cabal which is setting up the New World Order(tm).
From Aibohphobia
Aibohphobia is the term used to describe an irrational fear or phobia of palindromes. The word is of course a palindrome itself.
From Emily Dickinson
Put your text for the new page here.ok thank u for nothing! ur site has now stupidfied me!!!!!!!!!!!
From John F. Kennedy, Jr.
The russian mob was chasing Kennedy in a slow speed through Dallas on the day his father was shot. This child fell out of the back of the car. Hewas picked up by chinese intelligence officers. they sent him to siberia where the Russian mob thought he would perish. A pack of wolves took Jr. under the paws and raised him. He was released into his moms custody by the intelligent wolves. The wolves died shortly after.
From Linda Lovelace and the free Congo state[?]
Of course Linda Lovelace was a victim of Capitalist exploitation But this was nothing compared to the Genocide in the Congo
It must be noted that the integration of traditional economies in the Congo within the framework of the modern, capitalist economy was particularly exploitative. Leopold?s fortunes, ploughed back into monumental buildings in Brussels, for instance, was made mainly on the proceeds of Congolese rubber, which had never been mass-produced in surplus quantities.
Exploitation of the Dutch East Indies, French Indochina, German Southwest Africa, Rhodesia, and South Africa paled in comparison to that of the Belgian Congo. The fortunes of King Leopold II, for instance, the famed philanthropist, abolitionist, and self-anointed sovereign of Congo Free State (1885)?76 times larger geographically than Belgium itself?and those of the multinational concessionary companies under his auspices, were mainly made on the proceeds of Congolese rubber, which had historically never been mass-produced in surplus quantities. Between 1880 and 1920 the population of Congo thus halved; over 10 million ?indolent natives? unaccustomed to the bourgeois ethos of labor productivity, were the victims of murder, starvation, exhaustion induced by over-work, and disease. Some historian compares this death toll in the Congo to the Holocaust.
From Pat Kenny
He became an unexpected sex symbol after presenting the 1988 Eurovision Song Contest and was forced to leave Ireland for a short period as a result for his own safety.
- Nickname in college was "The Plank".
- Is reported to have bedded over 40 show girls.
- Was once a trainee priest, but was forced to leave the seminary over allegations of sexual relations with a nun.
- Was once suspected of being "The Midnight Commando", a Batman-style vigilante who fought night crime in late 1970s Dublin
- Once claimed to have travelled to space in "a giant hat". No-one believed him. Except Sven.
- Sleeps naked in a polythene bag which he believes gives him great sexual prowess.
- While this may be true, he has been locked up for life for a fiasco involving certain well known puppets, which allegedly "warped the minds of children everywhere". He now co-hosts a daytime T.V. show for minors called "Love in the Nick", on Nickelodeon.
He did present the Song Contest, may have been called The Plank (it sums up his 'charisma-deficit') and did have a staged run-in with three children's TV puppets (to try to give him a personality!) but the rest is 100% fiction. What was the author smoking at the time?
from a deleted page titled wikibrig: A Wikibriq is conceived as Fabric of connected Bricks, each bridging two mutually instructive concepts. Particular emphasis is given to their connotations, and how any one of them may realize the vis-a-vis.
Conceivably, an example begins in the realm of Seinfeld.
This page itself (whatever We're supposed to make of that) is meant not to interfere with the preferences expressed through Talk:Autodidact at the Fountain square.
from wikibrig's talk page: A modest example begins in the realm of Seinfeld. Connotations regarding the suggested syntax are only meant to be instructive about the concept itself, and may be articulated ideally by using it.
[`[ab~Newman:Loves|Elain],]
[`[ab~George:Alter_Ego|Vandelay],]
[`[ab~Kramer:Alter_Ego|Van_Nostrand],]
[`[ab~Kramer:ab~Alter_Ego|Pennypecker],]
[`[ab~Kramer:ab~Smarts|(For reasons perhaps only known to the author(s).)],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:Alter_Ego|(unknown)],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:Likes|Baseball],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:Familiarity|Cal Ripken, Jr.],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:ab~Alter_Ego|Cal_Varnsen],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:Sense|inspired],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:ab~Alter_Ego|not Karl_Varnsen],]
[`[ab~Seinfeld:The_Factory|Convertible],] ...
[`[ab~Seinfeld:ab~Mode_of_Transportation|It's a Turbo?!],]
Perhaps, if the Wikibriq concept were allowed to manifest itself, unremarkable constructions such as
[`[ab~Kramer:{{ab~Character:ab~Smarts}}|(For reasons perhaps only known to the author(s).)],]
or
[`[ab~Seinfeld:Alter_Ego|({{ab~Null:Yet_To_Be_Determined}})],]
may be avoided.
Frank W ~@) R, Jan. 7th, 19:27 (PST).
From Neighbours:
Its success is mainly due to the character Harold Bishop, whose fantastic wobbly cheeks were a hit with the ladies. Also great storylines and his antics with a tuba went down a treat.
From Viagra:
"Thanks, Pfizer!!!! uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh!!!" - MoniQue
From Complex analysis joke[?]:
Q: Why is the integral around Poland nonzero?
A: Because it's full of simple poles.
This is the end of the page. So much appropriate material has been culled from the articles that this page has overflowed. Please do not add more nonsense here. Instead...
Please add new bad jokes and deleted nonsense to:
All Wikipedia text is available under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License
|
Search Encyclopedia
|
Featured Article
|