Ior Bock

A former tourist guide to the island fortress Suomenlinna; Ior Bock has gathered a cult following, mostly from new age minded people from Goa. His teachings consist of imaginative etymological derivations of words, designed to give credence to equally imaginative traditional customs which supposedly form the nucleus of an ancient Finnish religion.

The central tenet[?] of his teachings is that man should not "waste" his semen but practise autofellatio to drink the Viisauden Vesi (water of wisdom). Women might also be allowed to "drink" it as a special favour and sacrament. As in many similar traditions, washing ones body is also considered unconducive to the cultivation of wisdom.

Besides joga excercises to keep limber, he and his followers conducted fund raising in order to finance an excavation to raise both earthly and spiritual treasures[?] from The Temple of Lemminkäinen. According to the lore passed to him, there should have been a huge rock slab and beyond that a huge cavern filled with gold and sacred knowledge.

Perhaps to even his own surprise the municipality allowed the excavation to take place. Fairly soon the dig hit bedrock. Undaunted, Ior Bock is now trying to raise cash to continue the excavation by blasting the bedrock away.