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Toilet humour

Bodily functions such as urination and defecation arouse intense anxiety in many people. For this reason, there is a whole sub-genre of humour, toilet humour based around excretion. This is particularly popular with children.

Much of the lyrical content of avant garde rock musician Frank Zappa's songs revolved around toilet humour, eg, "Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow" (from the album Apostrophe[?])

Many forms of toilet humour involve euphemisms for excretion, such as the following:


  • Breaking the seal
  • Change water on the goldfish
  • Draining the dragon
  • Draining the main vein
  • Draining the one-eyed monster
  • Go pee pee
  • Leak the lizard
  • Number one
  • Pass water
  • Piss stop
  • Pointing Percy at the porcelain
  • Release the pressure
  • Relieve yourself
  • Seeing a man about a dog (or a horse)
  • Shaking hands with the vicar
  • Sprinkle
  • Tinkle
  • Steering Stanley to the stainless steel
  • Syphon the python
  • Taking a leak
  • Taking a pee
  • Taking a piss
  • Taking a slash
  • Taking a whiz
  • Training Thomas on the terracotta
  • Twinkle
  • Visit Uncle Charley
  • Void my bladder
  • Write my name in the water


  • Drop a bomb
  • Drop some friends off at the pool
  • Giving birth
  • Go poop poop
  • Launch torpedos
  • Lay a cable
  • Make waves
  • Makin' bears
  • Number two
  • Pebble-dashing the porcelain
  • Pinching a yam
  • Taking a crap - see also Mr. Thomas Crapper
  • Taking a dump
  • Taking a shit


  • Blow off
  • Botty burp
  • Cut the cheese
  • Drop one's guts (as in, "Whose dropped their guts?")
  • Fart
  • Grunt (as in, "Whose grunted?")
  • Let off a howler
  • Let off a stinker
  • Let rip
  • Pass wind
  • Trouser cough


  • Barfing
  • Blowing chunks
  • Bow down before the porcelain god (On some occasions, the worshiper vows to the god never to drink again.)
  • Chunder
  • Park the tiger
  • Snow bank pizza
  • Spewing
  • Talking to Huey (or Ralph) on the big white phone
  • Talking to the porcelain telephone
  • Talking to the weeds
  • Technicolor yawn


  • Going to the loo
  • Going where even the king goes alone
  • Paying a visit
  • Powdering one's nose
  • Taking a biological break
  • Using the facilities

See also: Scatology, gross-out film, lighting farts

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