Neasden F.C.

Neasden F.C. are a spoof football team, the subject of a long-running joke in the British satirical magazine, Private Eye. They are now only wheeled out in the magazine at times of significant public interest in footballing matters, although in former years, they were a regular staple of the bi-weekly publication. Their long runs of defeats (frequently in double figures) led to several crises for their manager, the ashen-faced Ron Knee[?], who on numerous occasions has been assaulted by their fanatical crowd of supporters, Sid and Doris Bonkers[?]. Perhaps the most famous player Neasden have ever fielded is the one-legged defender, and prolific scorer of own goals[?], Baldy Pevsner[?].

Neasden's arch rivals in the North Circular Relegation League are Dollis Hill

See also:

• Neasden, London, England.
• Dollis Hill.